How many of you guys are really devoted to whatever you do in your daily tasks ?
It's been years since I've ever felt any sense of devotion to anything, let alone anyone.
People always tell me, always put your heart and soul in anything you do, only then you'll be satisfied with what you do or achieve. But whenever I do that, I always end up being heart-broken or disappointed. It's been so hard for me to devote myself to anything after that.
It's not bad doing everything without devotion, but you just can't feel the "flare" of doing anything anymore. But it's so much better than getting hurt everytime I do it. Is it wrong to do this ?
Can anyone tell me something to burn my devotions again ?? I've always been settling for just above average because of this, I cannot achieve the best I can because of this, I'm only staying at the level of mediocrity.
During my 2nd year, there was this one lecturer I had. He used to say us (his students) as "zombified" whenever he were to ask questions and we fell silent. Others thought it was a real funny joke, and it did seem that, but that word shocked me, because it somehow described what I was feeling constantly ~ a hollow, half-living, half-dead being. I'm very much alive, yet I'm somehow dead within me.
Deep inside I want to achieve more, but whenever I think of this, my past comes back to haunt me, it's like an alarm triggered within me that tells me to back off..
It's calming, yet it's torturing everytime this happens. I'm at a dead end.. I've been figuring this out ever since I can remember... need some serious guidance...
12 Years
6 years ago
44 comments:
I'm not good in advising any1 but I can tell u that i felt the same way too. I believe there r many of us would feel the same. There will always be a time when we feel discourage from the things we are doing. You could just say.. it's a way of life. There's always ups and downs in life. If there's no failure in life.. there will be no "fun" in life. Just make sure you do something u hv interest and passion on. And keep on trying because there are ppl who successfully achieve what they want the most =)
Anyways, I am not qualified to advice u those too, because I even cant achieve what I hv just said just now. Haha!! But it kept me trying.
I found your blog by fluke, looking for a quote I was trying to identify. I could give you any one of a million quotes to break you out of your funk, but they have to mean something to you. And please don't bother with the 'my past is blocking me future'. I've been there and said that and was stuck in the same place. Figure out what you want, and do a little each day. How much do you weigh? Are you in shape? For me it was my weight and lack of fitness that really stopped me from doing a lot. I'm in better shape now and have a ton more energy to get stuff done and when that happened, I felt better about myself. Good luck, get out of your own way and get going.
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